The blind has finally been lifted. I have decided to open my eyes. Savor the scenery, live the viewpoint, rise with the horizon. The pleas have been heard, the tears wept. But the fear still lingers as we start this new road. this road that we have no clue where it leads. This new journey we are taking.. Together. The fear still lingers.
The past has robbed me of hope for the future, my tomorrow drained in the rain of today. I dont doubt, lovely times i have had, and i have also been under he weather. But this fresh air i now breathe, is totally refreshing. In fact so refreshing that i am scared of liking it too much. I just might get hooked and that would be the beginning of the end. I just might get hooked and when i can breathe no more.. I'll die.
So i give you my hand as we approach the cross roads. They say we live once and truly we do. So i won't hold back, i'll water our seed, grow our flower until it blossoms. Until the petals wing out,plant themselves on the ground, bear others.. Signs of our seeds. We try, however far we get, we tried. It's going to be a long road this one, but as long as our feet can carry as and however far they do, let's make it happen.
This one's for you, Onduks!
Now yours.
Me.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Simply...
‘I am a simple man, I dream about loving you
And my simple mind is filled with thoughts of you
You will be mine…. Someday.’
As I sit here, listen to you
Your simple simplicity me, consumes
I exhale; what to simply write?
Simple, simply; Simplicity.
Said who simplicity simplifies?
Says who sheer vulnerability of soaring with a dream
Sheer vagueness of smiling at distant sighs, signs
Say who that this simplicity is… Just is.
My dream, is to simply live
Maybe not often in a simple way
But with each passing cloud that births day
My simple mind wishes not clueless naivety, but wise hoping, living… Simply live.
Yet these words, honestly, me they confuse
So how can I expect this writing in wanting to you sense fuse
Cross my fingers, maybe you’ll perceive, somewhat understand
That which in me is deeply diffused.
But hang on, this feeling I feel
My tongue rolls, sliding sound, tickling syllable turns word
The tips of my fingers peck on the board, I got it
This tongue, these fingers I use to simply speak.
There I go again, that word again; resonance so simple
In such a vicious complex circle called life
My simple dream, I suggest, I insist
My simple mind dreams of simply living.
Simply living… Someday!
And my simple mind is filled with thoughts of you
You will be mine…. Someday.’
As I sit here, listen to you
Your simple simplicity me, consumes
I exhale; what to simply write?
Simple, simply; Simplicity.
Said who simplicity simplifies?
Says who sheer vulnerability of soaring with a dream
Sheer vagueness of smiling at distant sighs, signs
Say who that this simplicity is… Just is.
My dream, is to simply live
Maybe not often in a simple way
But with each passing cloud that births day
My simple mind wishes not clueless naivety, but wise hoping, living… Simply live.
Yet these words, honestly, me they confuse
So how can I expect this writing in wanting to you sense fuse
Cross my fingers, maybe you’ll perceive, somewhat understand
That which in me is deeply diffused.
But hang on, this feeling I feel
My tongue rolls, sliding sound, tickling syllable turns word
The tips of my fingers peck on the board, I got it
This tongue, these fingers I use to simply speak.
There I go again, that word again; resonance so simple
In such a vicious complex circle called life
My simple dream, I suggest, I insist
My simple mind dreams of simply living.
Simply living… Someday!
In sheer Ambiguity.
So there she lay. Hand to her back, hand on her left breast. Was is she pain? Was she hiding her feminine nudity? Was she proud of what she had to offer as a woman, a seductive pose maybe? And her head lowered, almost kissing the ground, thanking her for making her who she is. Or is it whispering to the earth to swallow her up? Her face is covered up, she could be ashamed, she could be blushing...
Then beside her stand three of them, tall, slender, striking males. Their hearts worn on their sleeves, portraying outside what they inhibit inside. Their colors, their culture, them! But their faces have a lingering want,a longing. Their sunken eyes maybe because they are starved. Maybe because the light is to bright... their future is too bright perhaps? Or maybe they have come to the end of the tunnel and the proverbial light has shone.. Just who knows?
Yet these two, the bare woman and the covered men, all have stories to tell. Yes stories because their definitely uncertain paths seem to be imprinting more than a set of footprints.. And such are we all. In sheer ambiguity, we grope in the dark, looking for our place, our perfection, ourselves.
But this sheer ambiguity holds such meaning, that we never are willing to let it go. "The thrill of the chase", 'hope for a better tomorrow'.. symbolic of the much light this darkness holds. Like the MonaLisa, we are trapped in our own conditions, our own expressions, almost comfortable in them, that no other can really know what they are, who we are. We take cover in our smear cloth, our experiences, our plans, just us. The people we know best!
Are we afraid? Like hell we are. Of what? Everything! Everything? yes, EVERYTHING! But all this everything we so dearly hold on to really does amount to nothing in the long term. When it's time and dust recalls each of us (by name)to its bowels, we leave it all behind. Yet the young and restless, the old and even more restless have ran all their lives in a marathon called life, with no winner really. Because all the prizes weren't taken home, to the bowels of dust from where we came.
Amazing.
Such meaning in sheer ambiguity
Then beside her stand three of them, tall, slender, striking males. Their hearts worn on their sleeves, portraying outside what they inhibit inside. Their colors, their culture, them! But their faces have a lingering want,a longing. Their sunken eyes maybe because they are starved. Maybe because the light is to bright... their future is too bright perhaps? Or maybe they have come to the end of the tunnel and the proverbial light has shone.. Just who knows?
Yet these two, the bare woman and the covered men, all have stories to tell. Yes stories because their definitely uncertain paths seem to be imprinting more than a set of footprints.. And such are we all. In sheer ambiguity, we grope in the dark, looking for our place, our perfection, ourselves.
But this sheer ambiguity holds such meaning, that we never are willing to let it go. "The thrill of the chase", 'hope for a better tomorrow'.. symbolic of the much light this darkness holds. Like the MonaLisa, we are trapped in our own conditions, our own expressions, almost comfortable in them, that no other can really know what they are, who we are. We take cover in our smear cloth, our experiences, our plans, just us. The people we know best!
Are we afraid? Like hell we are. Of what? Everything! Everything? yes, EVERYTHING! But all this everything we so dearly hold on to really does amount to nothing in the long term. When it's time and dust recalls each of us (by name)to its bowels, we leave it all behind. Yet the young and restless, the old and even more restless have ran all their lives in a marathon called life, with no winner really. Because all the prizes weren't taken home, to the bowels of dust from where we came.
Amazing.
Such meaning in sheer ambiguity
What For Again?
So an eventful weekend for me doing nothing really...don't you have those ones too? When you're just busy chilling or doing nothing much with yourself. Then at the end of the day, you're the first one to yawn..ati nimechoka!!!
Anyway, such is life. Such is life when the doves have cried and they still bear tears within. Such is life when the moon has crashed the waves on the shores. When the stars have shown and it's light again..
But how do you go on when the writings on the wall have been erased? Then your hints are no more? When you have no idea how to start all over again? When it\s time to move on but the step is taking longer than you expected? Or the strength for the step itself is lacking? How do you even come up with the decision of crossing the roads in this circle called life?
You see i am a poet. And poets are more or less observers. You look into your life or that of another, put two and two together then come up with some catchy lines... Rhythmic shit if you ask me but hey, we all think poets are deep peeps??
And so as a poet, i say all this doesn't make sense. All this bickering of oranges, (or one and halves), or kazi iendelee, all this ish of the NSE running like a fish market or any other market that has no IPOs for that matter, all this hullaballoo of the highest paid CEOs. All this crap of get yourself a good education, get yourself a good job, get a good family... then what?
No sense at all... unless you soar with the eagle called hope. Who knows tomorrow? Even the next 5minutes? Who knows anything at all apart from right now? How will the human-designed tangibility be intertwined with this absurdity dubbed entirity in futurity? Told you, educated rythmic shit!!
Still, despite all this confusing jargon, we refuse to be defined by our present and fight with space, for space, to secure a better unknown. The unknown is always better for some reason. Always more promising, more fulfilling, more real, more tangible. Then when future becomes present, it's wanting..most times you have to look at the past.. You find yourself fighting on for more. Maybe a better idea, clearer path, wider range of options...
Maybe in the next lifetime...now thats scary!
Anyway, such is life. Such is life when the doves have cried and they still bear tears within. Such is life when the moon has crashed the waves on the shores. When the stars have shown and it's light again..
But how do you go on when the writings on the wall have been erased? Then your hints are no more? When you have no idea how to start all over again? When it\s time to move on but the step is taking longer than you expected? Or the strength for the step itself is lacking? How do you even come up with the decision of crossing the roads in this circle called life?
You see i am a poet. And poets are more or less observers. You look into your life or that of another, put two and two together then come up with some catchy lines... Rhythmic shit if you ask me but hey, we all think poets are deep peeps??
And so as a poet, i say all this doesn't make sense. All this bickering of oranges, (or one and halves), or kazi iendelee, all this ish of the NSE running like a fish market or any other market that has no IPOs for that matter, all this hullaballoo of the highest paid CEOs. All this crap of get yourself a good education, get yourself a good job, get a good family... then what?
No sense at all... unless you soar with the eagle called hope. Who knows tomorrow? Even the next 5minutes? Who knows anything at all apart from right now? How will the human-designed tangibility be intertwined with this absurdity dubbed entirity in futurity? Told you, educated rythmic shit!!
Still, despite all this confusing jargon, we refuse to be defined by our present and fight with space, for space, to secure a better unknown. The unknown is always better for some reason. Always more promising, more fulfilling, more real, more tangible. Then when future becomes present, it's wanting..most times you have to look at the past.. You find yourself fighting on for more. Maybe a better idea, clearer path, wider range of options...
Maybe in the next lifetime...now thats scary!
I am not afraid..
I am not afraid to be your lover,
I am not afraid to be your whore..... JILL SCOTT!
Why i started with those profound lines, i really don't know. Maybe coz this weekend i have been jamming with Jill and i loved it. I do love Jill. But here is a little something from me.
I am not afraid to walk tall
Even after my wall has crumbled
I am not afraid to give you my all
Even when my all is in shambles.
I am not afriad to live for you
Even when my life is you
I am not afraid to die for you
Even when i'd die without you.
I am afraid to tell you this
Even now when your next to me
I am afraid coz i don't need this
Even now whe i want it more.
I am afraid to let you soar
Even now when we are airborne
I am afraid to not be afraid
Even now when i am not afraid..
I am not afraid to be your whore..... JILL SCOTT!
Why i started with those profound lines, i really don't know. Maybe coz this weekend i have been jamming with Jill and i loved it. I do love Jill. But here is a little something from me.
I am not afraid to walk tall
Even after my wall has crumbled
I am not afraid to give you my all
Even when my all is in shambles.
I am not afriad to live for you
Even when my life is you
I am not afraid to die for you
Even when i'd die without you.
I am afraid to tell you this
Even now when your next to me
I am afraid coz i don't need this
Even now whe i want it more.
I am afraid to let you soar
Even now when we are airborne
I am afraid to not be afraid
Even now when i am not afraid..
Rythm of life.
From the bowels of my existence
the fringes of life
Springs out a song that thrives
A song, my song.
The rythm that holds captive
the lyrics in which i seek refuge
the tempo that keeps alive
with every innuendo and accelerando.
staccattos of my music
so natural is my music
so bare, so real
explaining everything.
get your song, be it
sing your song, feel it
days of our lives, your living
is in the way you sing!
the fringes of life
Springs out a song that thrives
A song, my song.
The rythm that holds captive
the lyrics in which i seek refuge
the tempo that keeps alive
with every innuendo and accelerando.
staccattos of my music
so natural is my music
so bare, so real
explaining everything.
get your song, be it
sing your song, feel it
days of our lives, your living
is in the way you sing!
The Place.
Said if there was any place
The only place
Where she would rather be
It would be where he is.
The retiring sun into the earth deep
As it ushered in the twilight breeze
He said it would push her closer, deeper
Into his arms, his charm.
As they sunk into a bliss
That nulls all existing
“Squeeze your hand, hope you know”
Seeing the stars in his eyes, “I know.”
She does know the warmth of the smile,
The warmth of walking the mile
He does know the warmth of their flow
The warmth of this flow.
Her place
His place
Their place
The place!
The only place
Where she would rather be
It would be where he is.
The retiring sun into the earth deep
As it ushered in the twilight breeze
He said it would push her closer, deeper
Into his arms, his charm.
As they sunk into a bliss
That nulls all existing
“Squeeze your hand, hope you know”
Seeing the stars in his eyes, “I know.”
She does know the warmth of the smile,
The warmth of walking the mile
He does know the warmth of their flow
The warmth of this flow.
Her place
His place
Their place
The place!
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